Motherhood

Posted by Alicia On Wednesday, January 25, 2012 0 comments


I'm a mother. It's been 7 weeks and that word still looks like it shouldn't be used to describe me. Mother. It's not a word that I ever really thought would apply to me. It's not a job that I ever thought I would be able to manage. But, seven weeks in I'm managing just fine. In fact, this is a job that I've had the least training and experience with but out of all jobs I've had, I'm enjoying the most. And I think I'm actually excelling at it. Instinct and intuition are weird.

I'm not saying it's easy. In fact, in those first two sleep deprived, hormone filled postpartum weeks I wanted to go back to work and give this job to someone else almost every hour. Parenting has a really steep learning curve. You have to learn on the job at something you've never done before and you hold a tiny little life in the balance. There are no do-overs. No Ctrl-Z. I don't want to be too over dramatic here though. I'm sure I'm not doing everything right. I'm just making sure the essentials are taken care of for him. Feed him. Burp him. Bathe him. Change him. Put him to sleep.

At first the little guy didn't do too much. He just slept and ate, slept and ate. But now, he is much more interactive. He recognizes me, studies my face, smiles and coos and stares at himself in his play gym mirror. He makes me laugh constantly. He only cries when he needs something, be it food, a change or a cuddle. But enough bragging...

I love seeing other people enjoy him. I have such a sense of pride that I can honestly say I have never felt about anything else in my entire life. I imagine that it will only get better from here.

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